where the experience ends, the writing begins.

ooops! i did it again!

... take 4

a few more hours, and i'm blowin' this popsicle stand!

i've packed, re-packed, realized i forgot that i packed a few things in the wrong suitcase, re-packed again, and now i'm done. :o)

looks like this is it! no turning back...

hope you all have a pleasant fall! i'll be thinking of y'all while in vietnam and please do keep in touch. this blog is officially (temporarily) out of service. you can keep up with my crazy antics in cali and vietnam on my new blog: vietblog2004

see y'all in january!

luv,
estelle

2 more days.

wow. said my goodbyes at church today... hmmm. i keep telling myself "it's only 4 months... 4 months... almost 12 weeks... that's it" - my friends have told me the first time really leaving home is always the hardest. dang. how true... my little cousin hope gave me the biggest, tightest, longest hug, and if it wasn't for the fact that she was cutting off my circulation and air supply, i probably would have shed a tear or 10 :oi

... so now i'm packing - err... started :o) actually taking a slight break at the moment. i also think i'm coming down with something... at first, i thought it might have been allergies, but as of today my throat has been feeling rather "ticklish". not good. i guess it also doesn't help much that my sleeping patterns have gone beyond nocturnal... yikes! but oy... in a matter of a couple of days, this blog will be temporarily defunct for the next 4 months - i'm in the process of creating a blog for my trip :o)

but for now, i must now go back and turn myself in to a mean, not-so-lean packing machine... WOOT!

they got me.

yeesh.


she who laughs last...


... also ends up wearing mud on her face.


*sigh*

ahh well. at least my pores are clean ;o)

sidenote: notice the Miss Saigon shirt i'm sporting... hehe!

no! not the facemasks!!

the big hfbc youth finale sleep-over: charlene and reymond are currently wrestling with the epilady (hmm. quite the scary contraption), and sankara is tying up his long dark locks in the room next door in preparation for his first facial mask, while i'm in hiding...

OHHHH CRAP!!! NOOO!!! THEY'VE FOUND ME!!! AHHHHHHHH!! lkjleawuiojdfklsj..!!

recap.

me and my cousin charlene "pre-concert" :D


"keep smiling... keep shining. knowing you can always count on me... for sure. that's what friends are foooooooor"


edith and farle: the stars of the show. notice the powerpoint screen in the background... throughout the whole night of the concert, at several moments hesed thought it would be "cute" to have my mugshot spinning around on an axis... ya know, like a rotisserie chicken ... thanks :oP


jasiel, me, auntie lisa, and christine - it's ALL about the hat, baby!


me and jacrise - once again... the HAT!


anything for the girls - jasiel, janelle, and me during our last-minute "improv" skit for the youngins...


"you'll be happy, you'll be happy, YOU'LL BE HAPPY!!!"


yeah sure. they all LOOK behaved...


the leaders at the fountain: "keep the candle burning!" (of course, we were only "pretending" to blow it out... hehe)


our attempt at the "flower-heads" shot... :o)

so much to do, so little time...

my social life has somehow managed to increase by at least 85% in the past week and a half. when i had said that this was going to be a whirlwind of a month, i sure wasn't kidding - in fact, it's been quite the understatement. getting everything together for this trip, running around doing last-minute housekeeping shtuff, chumming it up with friends and family, and even rekindling old friendships *sigh* (kris, why is it that the time i finally DO get to see you, i'm leaving in less than a week?!) have all kept me beyond busy and occupied - i haven't even begun to pack yet! i think i'd be in much better shape if there were 48 hours in the day, but such is life, and i must make do with what time i have left in this country ;o)

disclaimer: prepare for extreme bloggage.

since i've last blogged...

friday & saturday (20 & 21) - as a fundraising project for my missions trip to vietnam, my church hosted a concert on each night, starring two fabulous filipino singers who flew all the way down from texas to help us out. and our choir, of which the trained-vocalist in me had initial doubts about on thursday's practice, was pleasantly surprised at the finished product. as i expected, i came close to making niagara falls look like a wet napkin during my thank-you speech, but i avoided it ever-so-gracefully. and of course, my family, knowing that there wouldn't be enough time to cook with all the festivities happenin' all over the place, decided it would be smart to pre-cook enough food to last us an entire lifetime (who knew leftovers could taste so good!) *burp* :oD to my long-lost-friends who completely surprised me by showing up for moral support, you guys rock!

sunday (22) - what do you get with 14 pre-pubescent females, 5 youth leaders, and a whole lotta sugar? a whole lotta screaming, giggling, and good times :oP jasiel, jacrise, janelle, charlene and i - the ates (pron. ah-tehs, meaning "big sisters" in tagalog) - rounded up the 7-13 year old girls of our church and hosted our very first "God's Girls Night" mini-retreat at the j-sisters' house in sweet home ala-brampton. the agenda included a skit performed by the leaders (which involved me as a filipino lindsay lohan from "mean girls"), a lot of open sharing and discussion time, a moonlight walk and penny-toss at the oh-so-cool brightly-lit fountain, and an early-morning linedancing session before breakfast - the girls even had a "notebook signing" trade-off at the end of it. *sigh* wish i had something like that when i was 13... thankfully, the girls were adorable, and surprisingly well-behaved during most of the night and the morning... well, until the chocolate chip cookies came out fresh from the oven. then struck utter chaos. our initial plan was to tire them out before midnight... but apparently they managed to stay up later than we did, and out-wake us in the morning. dang nabbit. two things i've realized from this whole experience is that 1) i'm definitely not as limber nor as energetic as i used to be when i was 13, and 2) i know for a fact that one day i would love to have kids of my very own...

monday (23) - dinner with livi at karma: a new restaurant that just opened in 'sauga that serves both indian and chinese cuisine. absolutely delicious!

tuesday (24) - trekked back up to waterloo with tess, and to have lunch with good ol' johnny-boy before he heads out to k-dot for his masters. we found ourselves at the koh-i-noor restaurant on phillip street (mmm... more indian food!), which was then followed by more good times and conversation over gelatos somewhere along king street (good call, jon!). 'twas quite an adventure all on its own, but as always, 'twas great times. however, i must admit i'm slightly disappointed at the fact that i'll be missing out on the busker carnival happening on the 26th to the 29th on king street... especially after jon's scolding at me for not having been even at least once, in all my 4 years living in waterloo... yeeesh. and the broadway-filled hour-drive back to 'sauga with tess was just icing on the cake. i'll have to add that to the list of all the other things i'm gonna be missing out on while i'm gonna be gone... *sigh*
tuesday night found me in downtown toronto, meeting up with claudia, edmond, joannie, bikin, and wilkins for a generic farewell dinner at salad king on yonge street - best thai food i've had in a LONG time. i felt pretty proud of myself for overcoming the spicy goodness of the food. the night continued with our crew's usual indecisiveness, in trying to figure out what movie to watch, and what theatre to watch it in. realizing that neither of us knew where we were going after 1/2 hour of walking along yonge street, and after bikin further realized that he was in dire need of a bathroom, we decided to end the evening with bubbletea, ice cream, and waffles at 168 teashop...

wednesday (25) - more eating. at this point i feel like i've literally gained 10 pounds in a matter of days. but i remain a happy fat cat. kitty and ryan were so kind enough to take me out to lunch at the kabuki sushi restaurant in north york. once again, faboo times and delicious food... great thanks to kitty to reminding me about the chicken flu outbreak currently happening in vietnam, in which i have received further updates that the chickens have now given it to the cows... hmm. so much for eating meat while i'm over there. who knows, i may come back home a vegan just yet ;o)

thursday (26) - driving all around mississauga and shopping for the bare necessities, and ending the day off with our last waterloo + alumni girls gathering of the year at livi's house in good ol' o-town/o-dot (oakville :oD). 'twas an evening of baking goodness, our usual pig-out sessions (MORE eating!), new memories made, and the When Harry met Sally dvd. i was pleasantly surprised by the array of cards and gifts that were given me by the bestest chicas in the world... *sniff* i plan to put them all to good use while in vietnam - once i break out the roll-out cartoon map of canada and exhibit the mounty postcards to my students, WHILE sporting my brand new bumble-bee-yellow "emergency poncho" (which will come very useful since i'll be coming right smack in the middle of rain/monsoon season), they won't know what hit 'em ;o) - i have been warned by "mama" esther that the card she wrote me has a 90% possibility of making me cry... so i have decided to put off reading it until saturday... :o) *nostalgic sigh* these girls will definitely be a contributing factor to my homesickness in the next 4 months...

friday (today) - a final goodbye breakfast with ryan at the golden griddle in the AM, i've got a praise rally in the PM as a celebration of reaching our financial goal and of course, some good, wholesome worship - also something that i know i'll be missing out on while i'm 'nam... 'twill be my last time giving a sermon/message for the year too - yowsas! after the rally the whole hfbc youth crew will be heading off to ate b's place for a send-off slumber party, where sleep will probably not even be an option (as if it ever is when it comes to these things... tee-hee)

... and it's far from over - saturday and sunday will be also uber hectic - family bbqs and such... and yes, i must also start packing. *sigh* my life has definitely been quite the rollercoaster ride in the past few days. hard to believe that i'm only going for 4 months... but from the past week and a half, i've received more than enough love and support to last me an entire lifetime... so, without getting any more sappy than the past few days have lead me to be, THANK YOU - i've been saying these words a lot especially in the past few days, but these are two words that just can't be expressed enough. y'all sure know how to make a girl feel special ;o) ... not to mention making the act of leaving more emotionally difficult than it should be *sniff* but all sappy and emotional goodness aside, i've never been more ready to start this new chapter in my life... and that, my dear friends, deserves a resounding WOOT!

pocket aces

there's nothing better than spending a lazy wednesday evening bbqing in the rain and playing poker till midnight with some fine good people - 'twas a mini-gathering of waterloo folk over at ryan's tonight. and gee... for someone who has absolutely no idea about anything remotely related to poker, i did pretty well tonight, considering i won two games straight - it actually took me a while to get a grasp on all the poker lingo, and even longer to learn that you're not supposed to smile and giggle whenever you're bluffing (i have really got to work on that!), but claudia and edmond proved themselves to be quite the gurus of the game... now the question is: would i ever play for money? hehe probably not, but if you ever wanna play for plastic, i'm all in! :oD

just because i can...

[my name is]: estelle ann gonzales
[in the morning I am]: ... still awake
[love is]: never-failing.
[if I could see one person right now]: my grandpa
[I'm afraid of]: needles
[i dream about]: ... the weirdest things (ask me about it, and i'll tell ya some stories)

H A V E - Y O U - E V E R ?
[been in love]: nope - it was just my imagination running away with me...
[cried when someone died]: yes
[cried because of someone saying something to you]: yep.
[drank alcohol]: yes
[lied]: uh-huh
[fallen for your best friend]: nope
[had sex]: nope
[been pregnant]: err... not that i know of :oP
[been rejected]: many a time...
[rejected someone]: also many a time...
[been cheated on]: if i was then he sure fooled me.
[done something you regret]: ... no.

W I T H - T H E - O P P O S I T E - S E X ?
[what do you notice first?]: eyes
[he could definitely be a keeper if...]: he's christian
[worst turn off]: when they think with what's down there instead of with what's on top
[worst thing to say to him]: "i think of you like my own brother..."
[worst thing ever said to you]: "you'd be perfect if only you lost a few pounds" ...
[scruff or clean shaven]: hehe i'm all up for the scruff (within reason of course :oP)
[tall or short]: tall please! if the guy was any shorter than me, it'd be pretty sad...

W H O ?
[makes you laugh the most?]: my brother
[makes you smile]: my friends and family
[do you have a crush on]: ... nice try. ;o)
[has a crush on you?]: ... *sigh* let's not get into that.
[easier to talk to: boys or girls?]: depends on what you're talking about ;o)

W H O - W A S - T H E - L A S T - P E R S O N ?
[hugged]: my mom
[you instant messaged]: livi
[you laughed with]: tess

D O - Y O U ?
[color your hair]: sure do!
[habla espanol]: si, pero yo sólo hablo un poco

E T C.
[do you smoke?]: nope...
[are you obsessive?]: not really
[could you live without the computer?]: hehe i would like to think i could ;o)
[how many peeps are on you buddylist?]: 2134876972139746293764976238423 :oP
[what's your favorite food?]: everything except coconut flavoured couscous
[what's your favorite fruit?]: mango
[which hurts the most, physical pain or emotional pain?]: definitely emotional.
[trust others way too easily?]: hmm. not so much anymore.

F I N A L - Q U E S T I O N S
[i want]: to travel accross canada on a motorcyle!
[i wish]: all the fat jokes would stop...
[i need]: to learn how to be comfortable in my own skin
[i love]: being happy
[i desire]: peace of mind
[i strive]: to succeed
[i understand]: everyone is different
[i feel]: sometimes insignificant
[i avoid]: crying in front of people
[i try]: to always put everyone else first
[i speak]: too much at times
[i write]: to escape
[i am]: sometimes too judgmental of others
[i learn]: too many of life's lessons at once
[i miss]: sleeping in
[i fear]: complete vulnerability
[i hear]: the fan of my computer
[i wonder]: why i bothered to fill this out in the first place...
[i believe]: in Jesus
[i know]: that this survey is far from over...

F I R S T S
[first real best friend]: sharon in second grade
[first real memory]: my 4th birthday party where i wished for a lot of smurfs so i could tie them up with rope before blowing the candles (... don't ask!)
[first car]: ever? red '91 toyota corolla... of my own? black 2001 nissan sentra
[first date]: grade 6 with matthew norris, walking around the playground during lunch recess :o)
[first real kiss]: cory jones during "truth or dare" at lena's 14th birthday party (not at ALL the way i expected it to be...)
[first real break-up]: varun before frosh week
[first screen name]: saugapnai
[first self-purchased album]: cyndi lauper & new kids on the block
[first pet]: fishies... until my brother poured pepsi into their fish tank
[first piercing]: ears
[first big trip]: Philippines in '90
[first play/musical/performance]: the phantom of the opera
[first music you remember hearing in your house]: the soundtrack to the sound of music

L A S T S
[last cigarette]: don't smoke
[last car ride]: today on my way home from the bank
[last good cry]: 2 weeks ago
[last kiss]: my mom before i went to bed last night
[last movie seen in theatres]: maria full of grace
[last book bought]: an anthology of poetry around the world
[last book read]: ibid.
[last beverage drank]: water
[last food consumed]: yogurt
[last phone call]: tess
[last tv show watched]: while you were out
[last shoes worn]: black flip flops
[last cd played]: my mixed cd
[last item bought]: snapple peach iced tea
[last annoyance]: the fire alarm going off in my house while reading
[last disappointment]: getting back my english 247 marks
[last ice cream eaten]: mango tango from baskin robins :oD
[last shirt worn]: black v-neck tank top
[last words spoken]: "i'm sorry, mr. and mrs. gonzales are unavailable at the moment, would you like to leave a message?"
[last webpage visited]: http://www.blogger.com